Humor

Signs of the Times

In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels."

**************************
On a Septic Tank Truck:
Yesterday's Meals on Wheels

**************************
On a Plumber's truck:
"We repair what your husband fixed."

**************************
On another Plumber's truck:
"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."

**************************
On a Church's Bill board:
" 7 days without God makes one weak."

**************************
At a Tyre Store
"Invite us to your next blowout."

**************************
On an Electrician's truck:
"Let us remove your shorts."

**************************
In a Non-smoking Area:
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."

**************************
On a Maternity Room door:
"Push. Push. Push."

**************************
At an Optometrist's Office:
"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."

**************************
On a Taxidermist's window:
"We really know our stuff."

**************************

At a Car Dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."

**************************
Outside a Car Exhaust Store:
"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

**************************
In a Vets waiting room:
"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

**************************
In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
"Drive carefully. We'll wait."

**********************
(Oh, by the way)

Sign on the back of yet another
Septic Tank Truck:

"Caution - This Tanker is full of Political Promises"

 

Wrong Number

I dialed a wrong number and got the following recording: "I
am not available right now, but thank you for caring enough
to call. I am making some changes in my life. Please leave
a message after the beep. If I do not return your call, you
are one of the changes."

 

Easy Eggs

One Sunday morning, while stationed at Osan Air Base in
South Korea, I was in line for breakfast and noticed that
the cook behind the counter looked kind of harassed. After I
gave him my order, he asked me how I wanted my eggs.

Not wanting to burden him further, I said cheerfully, "Oh,
whatever is easiest for you."

With that, he took two eggs, cracked them open onto my
plate, and handed it back to me.

 

(Back)

 

 

 

 

Love Offerings and Tithes Appreciated
Send to seharrill@gmail.com

View Alphabetical Article List from InnerWords Messenger

Click for FREE SUBSCRIPTION

View Back Issues

Tell A Friend

Innerworks Publishing         Site Credits

E-mail your articles, questions or humor to:
 Suzanne@InnerWorksPublishing.Com

Copyright 2003-2017 Innerworks Publishing -- All Rights Reserved